"i wish i knew how to quit you."

There’s a total slump of interesting things in my life lately. Well aside from this one precious gift of a movie.

At work, I find myself juggling between chasing people, listening to Brokeback Mountain, chasing time, watching Brokeback Mountain, chasing ideas, and thinking of Brokeback Mountain. At home, I channel between Big Brother, Brokeback Mountain, American Idol, Brokeback Mountain, and bytes and bytes of blogs that I love going back to, the same way I like going back to Brokeback Mountain.

It’s official. I am not getting over Brokeback Mountain anytime soon. I could not believe how much this movie has affected me. The day after I’ve seen the movie, which was Monday, I was totally melancholic at work, my colleagues have noticed it right away. My day seemed gloomy, what with thoughts of Ennis and Jack never getting to share the rest of their lives together. All these while listening to the movie soundtrack, from the haunting overtures of Gustavo Santaolalla leading to the pining words of “He was a friend of mine,” “A love that will never grow old,” “I don’t want to say goodbye,” and “The maker makes” and the assuring words of love in “No one’s gonna love you like me” and “I will never let you go.” Country music never sounded this good.

Monday night I was able to download the movie off Limewire, which I immediately imported to my iPod, keeping me perpetually glued to Jack, Ennis and Brokeback Mountain, whenever, wherever.

There’s no quitting this.

I swear.


17 Responses to “"i wish i knew how to quit you."”

  1. 1 raph February 23, 2006 at 9:22 am

    came over from shigeki’s blog….

    ano ang nagustohan mo sa brokeback mountain, exactly? i have to admit that i didn’t enjoy the movie too much, at na-inis ako kay heath ledger kasi hindi niya binubuka yung bibig niya habang nagsasalita.

  2. 2 Chas Ravndal February 23, 2006 at 2:47 pm

    i guess you got yourself addicted to Brokeback!

  3. 3 Shigeki February 23, 2006 at 4:19 pm

    Okay, Raph’s show-off time. (-_-) I didn’t even understand any single word of the last sentence.

    Anyway, Brokeback mountain was an Okay movie but it didn’t haunt me like it did to you. :-) I guess it’s a great day to start a 12 step programme of Brokeback-mountain-holic?

  4. 4 Mr. Brian February 23, 2006 at 5:23 pm

    Thanks for the tip. ;). I’ll remember to put my guard up when watching this….

  5. 5 raph February 23, 2006 at 6:18 pm

    shigeki: look, mr. nice shoulders, i don’t show off.

    (>__< ) ( >__<)

  6. 6 Mr. Brian February 23, 2006 at 9:34 pm

    P.S. I think you’re running neck and neck with “Anonyboy” in the number of BBM viewings. ;)

  7. 7 Chaichakri February 24, 2006 at 12:49 am

    BROKEBACK mountain is banned in Malaysia….. urrrghhh

    But thanks to piracy, I managed a DVD copy… hee hee.

    I think the movie is very heart-moving, and I have learnt so much from the movie…

    A gay man should never sacrifice his true love for a marriage to a woman……

  8. 8 Kiss My Mike February 24, 2006 at 5:22 am

    Did you see the great “palo-palo” scene with Jake on it?

  9. 9 Jay February 24, 2006 at 10:46 am

    My friend’s just told me that somebody dies in the movie! Damnit!

  10. 10 Mark February 24, 2006 at 5:45 pm

    Hey, Raph, welcome! Nagustuhan ko sya sa maraming kadahilanan. Looking past the hardly understandable Southern accents of the two actors, it tells the story of two men who have found love amidst the constricting mores of the society they were living in. To quote R*yan, “Love found… Love kept… Love lost.” So yeah, it’s not always about happy endings, but the pent-up emotions welling towards the end of the movie, the unrequited love, the two shirts enveloping each other as one, those subtle heartbreaking moments, they made a great movie, well for me at least. And oh, did I mention two hot guys kissing and rough-fudging? Need I say more? Haha.

    Hey Chas! Belated happy birthday! Hope you received the funny e-card I sent you. Yup, I guess I got myself addicted to it. Five viewings and counting.

    Hey Shigeki! But you did enjoy the humping scene, didn’t you? Hahaha, kidding!

    Hey Mr. Brian, let me know what you think of the movie when you’ve seen it. Who’s Anonyboy?

    Hey Kitjar! From Rainbowland to Brokeback Mountain, you are a darling. Can’t believe Malaysia banned it! Like, hello?!

    Hey Mike! Oh yes! Wished I was the water running underneath him; sure would be a great view from there!

    Hey Jay! Somebody did. But I hope the spoiler wouldn’t deter you from watching it.

    Have a great weekend, everyone!

  11. 11 NeiLDC February 24, 2006 at 8:17 pm

    Hi i just crossed this world and brokeback was really good. i was in the premiere night of this here in madrid, spain like stupid without ticket but i managed afterall to get one with the author Annie Proulx.. check my blog as well.. ill add you on my list… nice blog…

  12. 12 raph February 25, 2006 at 5:32 am

    if you like melodrama as a movie genre, i’d suggest that you see some of john greyson’s movies. i really, really loved lilies.

    that was a really good movie and it had the cute-factor in it to boot!

  13. 13 savante February 25, 2006 at 6:58 am

    It was a really sweet movie! Who could possibly forget that last scene with the shirt?


  14. 14 Mark February 25, 2006 at 9:49 am

    A warm welcome, Neil! Thanks for adding me. :-) That must have been surreal for you, standing outside the theater with no ticket, and yet you were able to watch it, with Annie Proulx no less! Oh. My. God. You are one lucky guy! How’s chillin’ in Madrid like?

    Thanks for the tip, Raph.

    Hello Paul! It was a sweet movie. Yes. And that scene would continue to haunt me, forever. Glad you liked it. :-)

  15. 15 ash February 25, 2006 at 8:43 pm

    omfg… it’s so sad. waaaa… don’t think any scene’s gonna haunt me like they do you mark, but watching it changed my life somehow. Agree with Paul. The last shirt scene was so beautifully done. heart wrentching. *sniff sniff* now i wanna read the book!

  16. 16 R*Y A N February 26, 2006 at 5:25 am

    hey mark, thanks for the loverly comments you left on my blog. i found your site thru ohlala paris and thought it pretty cool. loved brokeback mountain as you would know – not so sad anymore. helped to see it again and to write about – a very cathartic experience. anyway, much thanks for the link back. hope all is well over there in manila – stay indoors! ;)

  17. 17 Chas Ravndal February 27, 2006 at 12:08 am

    heheheh. I will shortly check my emails! But anyways, thanks a bunch for sending me one!

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