extreme self-improvement

Picked this up at Hong Kong, a crazy great alternative to the mundane, cookie-cutter planner/diary.

Congratulations! You are the proud owner of This Diary Will Change Your Life 2006, the very latest in the cult bestselling series from authors Benrik Limited. Follow its instructions to the letter every week of the year, and your life will definitely change. Please note that Benrik’s philosophy is one of life-change at any cost: it could be for the better, it might be for the worse. Only one thing is guaranteed: it will make the year 2006 impossible to forget, even with the help of expensive psychotherapy.

Sunday, 1 January, New Year’s Day
Mental Preparation Day
Before embarking on your new life, take a moment to reflect and find strength for the year ahead. Focus on how pathetic your life has been until now. How dysfunctional your family is. How miserable your friends are. How few of them still call you. How much you hate your boss. How much your boss hates you. How thin the ozone layer is becoming. How wholeheartedly you loathe everything about your current self. Once you have written off your old life, you are ready to turn the page. Good luck!

Told you it was crazy. Have a wicked 2006 y’all!


10 Responses to “extreme self-improvement”

  1. 1 ish January 1, 2006 at 2:26 pm

    hi mark! akin na lang yung cute dary mo. hehe..it’ll be you new year’s gift for me. Thank YOUUUUUUUUUUU!

  2. 2 Shigeki January 1, 2006 at 7:23 pm

    Although the cover looks very very pretty, it sounds a little cult :) You have to do that on the very first day of year 2006? Think happy. :-)

    Have a pleasant second day of the year!

  3. 3 savante January 2, 2006 at 4:15 am

    The cover looks so damned cute :) Hope you had a great first day!


  4. 4 Mark January 2, 2006 at 5:53 pm

    Hi Ish!
    Thanks for coming over for dinner! I’m afraid I can’t give you this diary as it’s the only one I have. You can get it online for only 5.99 pounds, I think. :-)

    Hey Shigeki!
    Nah, didn’t do those things. Just posted em for you to see how crazy this diary is. Isn’t it now? ^_^ But it’ll give you the best laughs I’m telling you, all the crazy things it’d ask you to do on a weekly basis i.e. This week (Apr 3-9), step on as many people’s feet as possible, claiming it was an accident; or This week (Mar 13-19), mouth obscenities to passing strangers (“Hello horny” “My place or the alleway” “Fucky fucky sucky sucky”) ^_^

    Hello Paul!
    Isn’t it funny? I’m LMAO (laughing my ass off) everytime I see the cover, moreso turn the pages. Hope you had a great Jan 1, too! And a pretty year ahead!

    Happy New Year!!! Mwah!

  5. 5 Kiss My Mike January 2, 2006 at 8:09 pm

    While following the mental preparation steps, take a deep breath in, and as you exhale make the sound “OOOOOOOOOOMMMMMMMMMM”.

    Happy New Year!

    P.S. You from DLSU?

  6. 6 ~*galenlondeien*~ January 3, 2006 at 5:28 am

    That looks cool. Different, but cool. Happy New Year, Mark! :)

  7. 7 Mark January 3, 2006 at 6:35 pm

    Haha, Mike! (It’s Mike, isn’t it? ^_^) Nope, not from DLSU; I’m from Miriam College ^_^

    Happy new year, Karen! It is cool… and crazy… and psychotic… and risque… and lethargic… and much more! ^_^

  8. 8 Chas Ravndal January 4, 2006 at 5:21 pm

    i should buy that book as well ..lol hehehehe

  9. 9 Jay January 5, 2006 at 5:33 am

    Seen it in all the bookshops, but I don’t use diaries – I just don’t need them. Like what, I’m gonna forget to sleep all day then go to work if I didn’t remind myself?

    Anyway. Happy New Year, buddy.

  10. 10 Mark January 7, 2006 at 7:26 pm

    Hey Chas! It’s got pages and pages of hilarious stuff. So go buy one if you see one.

    Hey Jay! You are so right. I don’t even remember where I put it the last time. Now where is that darn diary? I’m not really a diary type of guy, bought it for the funny pages and cool illustrations.

    Happy new year to you, both! 6_^

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